Everything is all right. Maybe.
2007-05-22 12:32 a.m.

On the Job 88/365We were all diligently working away in the office when there was a loud beep over the PA system and a voice cam on and boomed: "Everything is all right! I repeat, everything is all right! It is now safe to reenter the building. Beep!" You could hear everything on our floor go absolutely silent as we realized something very big and scary had happened that they didn't bother to tell us about, let alone evacuate us with the rest of the building. Uh yeah. I jokingly yelled to my coworkers: "They probably thought we're so high up that we wouldn't be able to evacuate in time so why scare us?" Hardy har harr.

One of my favorite girlie stores online is the New York spa Bliss. Every year they have an amazing sale where I am able to buy some expensive face stuff. I got turned on to the Remedie Double Oxygenating moisturizer and am addicted to it. Unfortunately it's $95. Fortunately, it was on sale as Bliss! I also bought some of their exfoliating mud mask. I thought I would get a little tiny jar of some expensive magical elixir. But no, craziness! I got a huge ass tub of this stuff that looks like Tang. It's all orange, dry and flourey. Pretty cool. So I whipped up a batch last night and it turned into this orange pudding stuff. I slathered it on my face and went to watch South Park. The magical elixir dissolved the dead skin cells (all the boys are saying eeew and all the girls are going coool!) and it turned into a gelatenous mass that could be peeled off. Way fricking cool. It really did scrub out my pores and made my skin super smooth. I can hardly wait to do it again. But I'm weird that way. I get intense satisfaction out of cleaning my pores. I guess that's because I don't have much going for me right now. I'm single, sick, in pain, half blind, working hard to stay under the corporate radar, but damn it. I have fabulous pores.

I've got a few more things going on for me, I really do, but I'm kind of in a woe is me mood. One of my coworkers is about to pop out a bambino any minute now and when I got onto Amazon.com tonight it flashed a 70% off Baby Sale (they weren't selling actual babies, I checked) ad so I browsed around to see if there was something my coworker absolutely could not live without (don't you hate double negatives? Well do you?) and I started crying. Out of nowhere. Where's my baby? Where's my Mr. Darcy? It's not going to happen for me, is it? Damn. I was too upset to even buy anything from Amazon. You know things are bad when I can't spend money. Well hell.

On a more upbeat note, I've been still having fun with the 365 day project and have even been asked to be a moderator! Cool! I now have the power to delete people's photos from the pool and boss them around in discussion threads. I'll try not to let this power go to my head but it will be hard.

0 People have tried to sell me Viagra

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