The Lawn Mower Fairy.

2004-04-16 2:35 p.m.

I came home yesterday and found that someone had mowed my front yard and weeded it in the rain. It was like the lawn mower fairy had come over! Then I spied the little note on my mailbox from my cute next door neighbor. He offerred to do the backyard as well. I may have to hire him until I get my mower fixed. What a swell guy. The front yard looks 100% better. I'm sure he just did it to keep the property values up. He was probably worried that I was going to start putting old appliances and cars on blocks in the front yard next.

Here's a picture of the neighbor's cat "visiting" Loki. He was not amused.

Damned, Multnomah County Tax.

2004-04-15 10:26 a.m.

I put off filing my Multnomah county tax until today. It seems like everyone else at work is just as outraged as I am. Single people are getting screwed on this tax. With angry shaking hands I just wrote a check for $500. There goes dinner out, high heels, French perfume, broadband, books, etc. Grrrr.

Speaking of books, I was wasting time on Amazon.com and discovered that Dave Vanian of the Damned did a solo project 1995. How on earth did I miss that? So I�ve been listening to Dave Vanian and the Phantom Cords. His voice is so dishy. ~swoon~ I so want to have his love child. Just think of what a beautiful pale gothic child we could make together. Of course, with my luck it�d be born with fangs. Breast feeding would definitely be out of the question.

Imaginary friends and dreamlife.

2004-04-14 9:46 a.m.

It was hard getting up this morning. I was having a wonderful dream that involved deep intelligent conversation with a very attractive water deity. We were lounging in the surf and just starting to hit if off when my alarm went off. Bummer. I always wake up remembering my dreams and my dreams are always long drawn out novel type adventures. They are always in color and contain music, scent, texture and a vast range of emotions. There are intricate character relationships with lots of action and excitement. Some of my best writing has come directly from writing down a dream and then letting my mind take off with it.

Which brings me to another strange part of my private life. I have imaginary friends. Lots of them. Ever since I started writing my own books I�ve carried around people inside my head. They talk to me. I�ve found myself sitting on my couch realizing that a half an hour has gone by while I had a long eloquent conversation with someone who doesn�t really exist. Sometimes I�ll end up writing myself into a corner and will stop writing while I try to figure out what to do with the plot. If I wait too long, I�ll find the characters invading my dreams. It�s like they�re letting me know that they are bored and ready to start the adventure again. I used to think that I was teetering on the edge of some form of schizophrenia until I read an article by Alice Walker. Her characters visit her and talk to her as well. Does this happen to anyone else?

No puppets, spa, blood and working for the man.

2004-04-13 9:32 a.m.

For the record, there are absolutely no puppets in Puppetry of the Penis. It was just two naked Australian men on stage playing with their wangs. With that said, it was very very funny and I laughed until my sides hurt. I highly recommend the show if they come back to Portland or to your fair city.

I played hooky from work yesterday and went to the spa. I got facialized, exfoliated, massaged, pummeled and whirlpooled. I even had a little down time between services to lounge on a couch and read my silly British sci fi book. It was very relaxing and much needed. I came home, ate lunch and lounged around with the cats while watching Crossing Jordan and Law and Order SVU. A very relaxing day.

For some reason my thyroid has swelled up. I went to the doctor on Friday and the Kaiser vampires took four liters vials of my blood. The doc called and told me that my bloodwork came back just fine except for high cholesterol (doh!) but I still have to see an endocrinologist next Monday. My fears of dropping dead from cancer have diminished, but I�m still a bit nervous. I�m hoping it�s just a stupid viral thing that will go away on its own. Nothing like a good medical scare to put your whole life in perspective.

Even though I sound like a complete slacker, I did take home three files this weekend to work on. We had a meeting at work and are basically required to do overtime until half way through July under threat of no raises, yanking the work at home option, no bonuses, public ridicule and flogging. No rest for the wicked. If you need me I�ll be in my cubicle.

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