Off to the vet we go

2002-04-24 3:27 p.m.

Tonight I have to take the cats to the vet for their annual check up and vaccinations. This year they are too big to fit in the same cat carrier so I had to go out and buy another one. I've asked Simon to come home from work early to go with me and help. Managing two yowling stressed out cats is more than one girl and a vet technician can handle. Last year when Trinity got her shots she got so pissed off she bit me! Me! I didn't stick her with the needle. Did she bite the cute vet technician? No, she was angry at me. The also have a tendency to leap the divide of the exam table to the supplies where they dig out the cotton balls and knock over the q-tip jars. Last year Loki took a flying leap off the scale towards the Vets head. Frankly I'm surprised they rescheduled us for this year. This year I'm bringing extra muscle to back me u, as well as a teflon jumpsuit, helmet and hockey mask.

The extra excitement this week has been trying to get a stool sample to bring it. First of all with two cats you have to catch them in the act in order to know which cat you're getting the sample from. We "caught" Trinity doing her business and put it in a plastic bag. That was on Sunday. So I called the vet and was like "Uh, how, uh, fresh does it need to be? It's kind of hard to catch them doing it." So in our refrigerator is an empty salsa container with the words "Cat poop NOT salsa" written on the top of it. Very strange.

I'm not looking forward to the car ride. They both scream like you're trying to kill them. I've tried talking to them, playing music, driving fast, driving slow, singing, nothing works. They both cry and howl like it's the end of the world. It's times like this that I wish I had a mobile vetranarian. Someone who would come over with all the supplied and treat them in my house.

Here are my recent google hits:
Armpit headlocks women
Wanted to * off * high heels
Pantyhose ripped sandals

For google hit hilarity go visit my buddies at Odd Google.

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