And the war trundles on.
2007-08-24 5:28 p.m.

My dad emailed me this joke today: The War Department briefed the President this morning. They informed Bush that two Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq. To everyone's amazement, all the color drained from Bush's face, then he collapsed onto his desk, head in his hands, visibly shaken, and almost in tears. Finally he composed himself and asked, "Just exactly how many is a Brazilian?"

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iPhones, Nightmares and Smithers, oh my.
2007-08-22 2:01 a.m.

Cyber Assassin 180/365I know you've all been worrying about my iPhone but she's fine (and apparently female). My coworker who reads my blog found my phone on my desk and put it in a drawer to keep her safe. *Whew!* I'm glad. Well, I got a bunch of work done today and organized my workflow so I'm hoping that I'll quit having nightmares. The only other thing that could be causing them is money problems. The medical bills from being ill have finally taken their toll and I'm in some trouble. Being a grown up really sucks! I'm hoping I'll be able to figure something out soon and get everything in order. I had a dream last night that Mr. Burns broke into my house with Smithers. I remember I wasn't sure if I should be scared of them or not. I wonder what that means. Hmmmm. Mr. Fabulous just left a comment telling me I'm having nightmares because he's sneaking into my room at night and describing what Richard Simmons looks like naked. While this seems fairly plausable, Mr. Fabulous is pretty stealthy and has nothing better to do, I don't know if that would truly frighten me. I suspect that Richard Simmons naked would look like a naked GI Joe doll, (kind of smooth down there) only shorter and much bigger hair. But that's just conjecture.

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Donde esta mi iPhone?
2007-08-21 1:43 a.m.

Raspberry Fingers 178/365I'm going through withdrawals right now. It's much worse than I thought it would be. I left my iPhone at work. At least I think I did. I hope I did. I tried to call myself and no one answered so that might be a good thing. I last had it at work when I was listening to a lecture on why zebras don't get ulcers. You really should go download that from the iCrack store for free right now. I'll wait. It's really neat, he talks about the adrenal system and stress and what happens physiologically to our body when we go into fight and flight mode (stress) for extended periods of time. What was nice is that he didn't blame the victim for gettign sick. It was all about the body and what happens to each bodily system when it experiences stress. But enough about that. I miss my iPhone! It's crazy but I carry it around with me everywhere. It sits next to me while I watch TV so I can check the weather, e-mail, or my stocks. When I go to bed I curl up with it and watch and episode of Family Guy or South Park. I feel utterly lost without it. I'm hoping no one walks off with it. My work place is pretty secure and I can't really see the cleaning crew taking it. But still. I want my baby back.

I've been having horrible nightmares for the last couple of weeks, so last night I cleaned my bedroom from top to bottom and feng shued the hell out of it. I cleansed, exorcised, dusted, aromatherapies, polished and washed everything. I still had bad dreams last night although it wasn't quite of the omigod that monster just bit off my left leg and now he's going for the other one variety and more of the stressy I can't remember the combination to my locker and I can't take the algebra final today because I'm in my underpants and don't have a pen type. Alas. I'm not sure what to do next. I see my guru in two weeks. Maybe she can knock me back into spiritual balance cause I don't know what else to do. I want my fun movie length action adventure romance dream life back.

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