Do not bite the barista.
2003-12-13 11:16 a.m.
I was out of coffee this morning so I hopped into my newly alarmed and steroified car and drove to Motor Mocha for some coffee. The car in front of me had a tiny yappy dog hanging out of the driver's side window barking wildly at the barista. After the woman paid for her coffee, the barista handed the woman back her change. Then the barista handed the little dog a huge milkbone. Yappy dog disappeared into the backseat with his prize. Problem solved.
0 People have tried to sell me ViagraKung fu, car hell and Jesus Presley.
2003-12-12 8:40 p.m.
I went back to kung fu class this morning after a month of hiatus. I did pretty good during most of class. We worked on club counters which means we beat each other with padded sticks and worked on timing, whether or not to bolt in before or after a swing. At the end of class I worked on my stances, and realized how much muscle mass I've lost in my legs. I'm still wobbly.
Then I spent four hours waiting for Stereo King to put in my new swanky stereo and loud obnoxious security system. Jesus. A girl can only shop and read the paper for so long.
On an up note I discovered that Shut up and Dance has moved to the Fez ballroom on Friday nights starting in January and that Jesus Presley is playing for free tomorrow night. The theme is "get drunk with Santa." Sounds like fun.
0 People have tried to sell me ViagraMystery Solved!
2003-12-11 11:51 a.m.
I'd just like to send a shout out to Amanda who has identified herself as the Tri-Met lurker. Yes, I remember you from when you worked here! I'm glad you're getting paid more now. I'll be awaiting my personal bus every Monday and Wenesday from now on. Could you also make sure that the bus driver is single, male, (straight) good looking and in his early thirties? Thanks. :)
1 People have tried to sell me ViagraPipe dreams and the lottery.
2003-12-11 9:37 a.m.
So I was cleaning out my desk yesterday and came across a bunch of lottery tickets that I was sure I had checked on the web but hadn't won anything one. I took them downstairs and ran them through the lottery ticket machine. One beeped gleefully I was a winner. $21. Not bad. Now if I could just win the 88 million. Wouldn't that make for a good Christmas? Don't I deserve it? If I win I'm going to build a big kung fu school and hire some black belts to teach and I'll teach a yoga for martial artists class. Enough with pipe dreams, I'm way past due on my work. I need to put in some serious overtime if I'm going to take time off after Christmas.
I am the number one google hit for "Sydney is so cool." Well, duh!
1 People have tried to sell me ViagraPublic transportation plea.
2003-12-10 10:18 a.m.
I took the bus to work this morning and was pleased that it wasn't a traumatic episode. Now, there is someone who visits kungfukitten on a regular basis from Trimet.org. Would you like to say "hi" and identify yourself? I kind of feel bad for ranking on public transportation because Portland really does have the best public transit system in the entire world. It's not the buses or the drivers that I have a problem with. It's the people that you allow to ride the bus. If you could please keep the following people off the bus I would appreciate it:
Really really drunk men that want to sit next to me and be my boyfriend
Mother's whose infants are projectile vomiting
People just released from prison who want to tell me all about it
People going through heroin withdrawls
All teenagers
People who haven't bathed in over five days
The people who think government agents are chasing them
People who sing with their headphones on
That about covers it. Thank you for (not) riding Tri-Met.
0 People have tried to sell me ViagraRan out of chi. Bite me.
2003-12-09 11:09 a.m.
I took another day off because I couldn't drag myself out of bed this morning. I was so incredibly tired. I'm going to see my acupuncturist this afternoon and then back to kung fu class tonight. It should be good for me. All of it.
It must be cold outside because both cats slept with me last night. Trinity curled up on the back of my neck and Loki was under the covers against my belly.
I was just informed by my parents that I'm hosting Christmas this year. Yikes, I've got some decorating to do. I'm thinking about pulling some money out of my savings account and having dinner professionally catered. It would be less stress and I could concentrate on having fun and sipping wine rather than burning something in the oven.
I did a little Christmas shopping yesterday. At Presents of Mind you can buy a watch band and little silver letters to spell out anything you want. There's even a sign encouraging you to put together dirty words. I made one that said "Bite Me." Sort of offensive and vampiric all at once.
5 People have tried to sell me ViagraReclaiming the bedroom.
2003-12-08 2:48 p.m.
In a sudden insane urge I have redecorated the bedroom. It all started with a coupon that showed up in the mail from Linen's and Things. I bought a harem red floral bed in a bag. Loki patiently waited on the stripped bed until the sheets came ouf of the dryer because making the bed is the highlight of Loki's life. Nothing is as fun as chasing sheet mice, smoothing down the corners and carefully inspecting between the fitted and the flat sheet. I also bought a red and gold silk curtain for the window. It's very thick and keeps the room nice and dark. I'm considering painting the walls gold. I like to think of my new look as Geisha meets harem.
2 People have tried to sell me Viagra