Testing shots.
2004-02-28 5:08 p.m.

Kung fu testing was today. I hung out for awhile and took some pictures. I was bummed out that all the people testing for brown were at the back of the school and out of my range of focus. Luckily there were lots of people with cameras so there should be some good shots of everyone. Here are a few of my favorites from today:

Jillian shows that you can't get them started training too soon as her baby practices saluting in.

I have no idea whose legs are up in the air.

Dare I say it? Everybody was kung fu fighting!

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Scene from the novel written on the bus.
2004-02-26 11:24 a.m.

I woke up to find two cats in my bed and the scrambling sound of a spider monkey running down the hallway. I liked animals but I would never understand Byron's obsession with them. His house was like a zoo. I skritched the cat closest to me under the chin before rolling out of bed. I stretched listening to the sound of my vertebra crack. I was getting too old for this. I ran my hands down the black silk night gown. It felt too luxurious, I was used to sleeping in ratty band t-shirts.

I went over to the window and pushed back the heavy velvet drapes and found it still light out but night was approaching fast. I was living on vampire time again.

I realized that I was running out of clean clothes when I saw a pair of new jeans with a red velvet shirt draped carefully over a chair by the bed. I walked over and fingered the fabric. Simply written was a note set on top which said "for Marae." I checked the tags, expensive and in my size. I picked up my new clothes and walked down the hall towards the bathroom. Frederick appeared before me in his perfectly pressed trousers and crisp white shirt.

I held the clothes up against my chest. I hadn't thought to put the robe on, I figured I could make it two doors down to the bathroom withough being interrupted.

Frederick tried to be polite and look me in the eyes but not before he lazily let his eyes drift up my legs.

He smiled somewhat sardonically.

"I was suppose to wait for you to rise and inquire if you needed anything." he said primly.

"Perhaps some coffee when I come downstairs." I answered.

"Of course m'am." he said and continued standing in front of me.

"And Frederick." I said.

"Yes, m'am?"

I leaned in close. "I prefer to bathe alone." I whispered suggestively.

Frederick's face turned deep red and then he began stammering incoherently. It was only when I tilted my head towards the monkey sitting in the sink watching us that he finally understood what I meant.

"Of course, m'am." he said and walked into the bathroom and coaxed the curious spider monkey into his arms. He walked past me at a quickened pace, averting his eyes.

I covered my mouth with my hand so he wouldn't hear me laugh.

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Sex on heels.
2004-02-25 1:29 p.m.

Sometimes a girl just needs a little shoe therapy in order to perk herself up a bit. Sexy sexy strappy shoes with enough heel to give me a couple of inches while still allowing me to traipse through downtown with ease. I feel so much better now.

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Cartoon hair & kung fu.
2004-02-25 9:39 a.m.

As a testament to my innate geekiness, about half the season passes I have on my Tivo are for cartoons. My newest anime fetish is Witch Hunter Robin. I've been trying really hard to master her hair style. It's not easy. First you have to get two really high, even pony tails. Then you need to fold them over while leaving some strands hanging down. Next you have to bind them with ribbon. It's hard getting them to stick out sideways rather than flopping downward.

Kung fu class was fun last night and managed to get rid of my day long headache. I got to confuse a new student with a grab counter then Jillian and I beat each other with a stick. Actually we worked on club counters then got creative on different ways to hurt someone trying to beat you with a club. One sequence sets you up perfectly for a sweep. You can so easily kick their leg out and throw them on the ground. Beautiful. I love it when things like that just come together. Testing is this Saturday, I will be on hand as photographer. Wally and Tim are testing for their brown sashes. You guys kick ass! (literally)

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This post is dedicated to Rebecca.
2004-02-24 11:01 a.m.

"I am Dr. Zoidberg! Homeowner!"

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Love, actually.
2004-02-24 9:16 a.m.

On Sunday I checked movie listings trying to come up with a matinee to watch and possibly drag someone along with me. I came up with two movies "Love Actually" and "Fifty First Dates" then upon further contemplation I decided to swear off all romantic comedies for a while. I just didn't think my heart and soul could take it. I also swore off all forms of Jane Austen and anything by Shakespeare that did not involve everyone's death at the end. To my surprise Rebecca called me last night and tried to entice me to go see "Love Actually" with her. Dead silence. She promises me wine. I relent. I knew I was in trouble when we were both sniffling during the opening credits. It's a very cute movie and nothing is more adorable than Hugh Grant dancing around to the Pointer Sisters. I was sad that the girl at the office didn't get her cute man in the end. Damn you love! The one thing I did learn from the movie is that boys are stupid and some are worth fighting for. Now I'm going back to reading 19th century biographies and watching Jackie Chan movies.

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Death lives down the street.
2004-02-23 11:58 a.m.

I found this on Oregonlive. Apparently, it was a homicide. Yikes.

Monday, February 23, 2004
9:32 a.m. - Body found in SE Portland home
Press release from the Portland Police Bureau

At about 3:45 a.m., February 23, 2004, police were dispatched to a house in the 5500 Block of SE Powell Blvd regarding an assault. The caller said a man was possibly having a seizure as a result of a fight. The caller said the man may be unconscious. Fire and abmulance were dispatched as well.

Upon arrival, officers and medical personnel determined there was a man inside the house who was deceased.

Homicide detectives are investigating this case. The investigation is ongoing.

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I'm going back to bed.
2004-02-23 9:46 a.m.

I had a dream this morning that someone shot me with an arrow that lodged in my right side. Ouch, talk about the girl with a thorn in her side. I remember not wanting to die. I tried to think up an excuse to drive to work this morning but ended up taking public transportation - the proletariot petri dish. Everyone was coughing, hacking, spitting up and sneezing. I'll be lucky if I make it home alive. The police had a house covered in crime scene tape on Powell. Downtown I was passed by three ambulances and a fire truck. When I got to Starbucks this morning they never gave me my coffee. I had to wait until everyone had left and clear my voice dramatically. "Oh we threw that out, sorry." The barista said as she quickly made another shot in the dark for me. I can only guess what the rest of this day holds for me. If you need me, I'll be ducking and covering under my desk with a flashlight and a file.

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