New Years Resolutions 2004 - The Easy Way.
2004-12-30 9:40 p.m.

Every year I make New Year's Resolutions and every year I fail to make all of them. It's kind of depressing. So this year I decided that I'm only going to make resolutions that I absolutely know that I can keep.

1. I will drink copious amounts of red wine.
2. I resolve to use my breasts to get more attention
3. I promise to sing karaoke badly and loudly.
4. I vow to write crap and force other people to read it.
5. I will call into work sick when I'm feeling fine and spend the day watching Law and Order reruns and painting my toenails.
6. I pledge to shake my groove thing at every opportunity
7. I promise to waste wads of cash on sparkly eye shadow.
8. I resolve to read more trashy supernatural romance novels.
9. I vow to watch entirely too much television.
10. I will make a fool out of myself on stage whenever I can.
11. I pledge to somehow injury myself in a completely inane manner.
12. I promise to laugh so hard vodka martini comes out of my nose.

3 People have tried to sell me Viagra
I'll take mine pink.
2004-12-29 12:09 p.m.

Part of my Christmas gift was tickets to Pink Martini last night in the Crystal Ballroom. What an amazing show. There�s nothing quite as fun as watching Thomas Lauderdale play the piano, his enthusiasm is amazing. I managed to push our way to the very front left side of the stage. I was so close that I could have pinched Thomas on the ass if I wanted to. I tried to snap a couple of pictures with my camera phone.

Here�s Thomas on the piano and China singing (psst! We think she�s about three months pregnant � round in the middle and bodacious boobage.)

Here, the lovely Miss Gay Seattle came out to sing a song with the band. When she walked onto the stage someone behind us said in awe �Oh! You�re so beautiful!� �It�s just make up, honey,� she whispered into the microphone.

4 People have tried to sell me Viagra
Eeeeew.
2004-12-28 10:20 a.m.

"A study by the University of Arizona in 2002 found the typical worker's desk has hundreds of times more bacteria per square inch than an office toilet seat." --CNN News Article

I guess I can quit freaking out about the restrooms here and start obsessing about my cubicle instead.

1 People have tried to sell me Viagra
In case you were wondering.
2004-12-28 9:29 a.m.

Steal this one or make your own at Church Sign Generator.

2 People have tried to sell me Viagra
A brand new look for a New Year!
2004-12-27 10:04 p.m.

Hi gang! I've decided to go for a brand new look for the new year. I'm still trying to work out some of the bugs in the system. The main bug I'm dealing with right now is when you hit the button for the "last week" the bottom of the page ends up getting cut off. This also happens in all my archived weekly entries. If anyone who is savy in HTML can figure out what is causing this, I'll buy you a six pack of beer or a bottle of pinot noir. It's driving me batty but for now I'm giving up and going to bed. Oh, and by the way Flickr.com rocks!

2 People have tried to sell me Viagra
Cameraphone + vodka + push-up bra = blackmail
2004-12-27 9:49 a.m.

So who was the brilliant person that came up with the idea for camera phones? You know that they are only used by drunk ass people to take pictures of other drunk ass people. By the way, I'm the one on the right.

8 People have tried to sell me Viagra

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