Shaking my groove thing.
2003-10-05 2:39 p.m.

Yesterday was a busy day. Simon and I headed downtown early and spent some time in Powell�s bookstore. Simon came away with some P.N. Elrod paperbacks and I got a huge hardcover biography on Mary Shelley and a rare copy of "An Atlas of Pern" for my science fiction fix.

Later we met friends at Typhoon for Thai food then hiked up Broadway and saw the play "A Fine Mess." It was a comedy that addresses how the art goes on in the face of terrorism. Very funny but also quite thought provoking. It disturbed some of my friends how the play kept going in an out of acting and reality. Personally, I found it seamless and it didn�t bother me.

As half our group was still perky after the play we headed back towards Burnside and went to Lola�s Room and danced to new wave and gothic inspired 80s music. I�ve been in desperate mood to shake my groove thing so dancing until 2:00am was very therapeutic. Huge props to DJ Gregarious who played Peter Murphy�s "Cuts you up" when I requested it.

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The HR department is finally loosening up.
2003-10-02 12:47 p.m.

My ultra conservative work place for the first time since I started working here in 1995 is encouraging people to dress up for Halloween. Normally I telecommute on Fridays but I may have to stop in an see what actually happens. I think the new president of HR is on drugs..and I like it.

Here are his rules (my witty comments in italics):

*For obvious security and safety reasons, unrelated to the federal Homeland Security Department, no masks will be permitted (sorry). There goes my ninja mask

*Decorations will be acceptable around the work space, as long as they do not promote religious or Satanic beliefs (even satirically), violence, or could be perceived as demeaning to people of any race, gender, ethnic background, nationality, political or religious persuasion. In other words, don't paint pentagrams in your cube and sacrifice cattle and/or babies

*Costumes should offer sufficient coverage and not be sexually suggestive in any manner. No 'hos

*Halloween day should not be an excuse to socialize excessively and suspend normal work practices. Let's remember that our customers are counting on us.Go ahead and goof off all day, just don't tell anyone I said you could do it.

Then he basically goes on to tell the ultra conservative Christians in the office who freak out every year at Halloween to piss off - in very politically correct business lingo, of course.

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Ever wonder what happened to Wonderwoman?
2003-10-02 9:38 a.m.

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Shoegasm.
2003-10-01 2:07 p.m.

Oh. My. God. Meier and Frank is having this amazing shoe sale. The 10th floor is filled with shoes and they are all, get this, $9.99. I got a pair of brown suede high heeled boots, black Ralph Lauren lace up loafers and a pair of strappy black high heeled sandals for $29.97. They didn't have many things in size 5 1/2 - 6. It was only two racks and I was desperately going through next to the little old Asian ladies. Luckily we have different tastes in shoes so no fights broke out. Score!

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Don't mess with the ninja.
2003-10-01 10:24 a.m.

I went back to yoga class yesterday. I took last week off to conserve my engery for kung fu camp. Yoga was fun, we did a free form yoga dance to some arabic music. I threw in some kung fu and qigong moves for good measure. The only problem is I went a little crazy with the backbends and now my lower back is killing me. At least I looked cool while I was doing it.

Pervert patrol last night came up with two neighborhood cats and one possum, but no Peeping Toms. The dynamic duo of Kungfukitten and Simon eventually gave up and watched reruns of Law & Order SVU. We think our house is too well lit to be targeted. Plus we have a security system with signs and stickers all over the front yard. Simon wants to line the fence with razor wire but I've talked him out of it. Razor wire does not enhance curb appeal.

My neighbor has a big wooden coffin in his front yard. I hope it's an early decoration for Halloween. Speaking of Halloween, I was watching an episode of Conquest last night where they did "Weapons of the Ninja." I think I'll dress up like a ninja for Halloween. I can throw cardboard stars at people, sneak around and it would give me an excuse to buy another sword.

2 People have tried to sell me Viagra
Hypochondria, invisible bras and perverts.
2003-09-30 9:34 a.m.

I woke up this morning certain that I was dying of meningitis. My nose was stuffy, my ears plugged up, lymph nodes swollen and my neck hurt. I stumbled into the bathroom to take my temperature (making sure I didn't use the cat thermometer - don't ask) certain that it was at least 104 degrees and I would be able to call in sick to work and die quietly in my bed. Nope, it was my normal reptilian temperature of 97.6. I don't know if I caught something at kung fu camp - there was a whole lotta touching going on- or if was from work or the dreaded public transportation. Either way. I have a cold but I'm at work.

Last night at improv training we worked on mime use of physical space. We made invisible objects, used them and passed them to the person next to us where they had to use it then change it into something new, use it and pass it to the next person. As I was sitting next to one of guys I thought I'd be tricky mean and I created a bra and handed it to him. Instead of pretending to put it on, he pretended to put it on me. Ah! Foiled! But it was good for a few laughs.

In other news the neighborhood is all abuzz as we have a Peeping Tom who has been targeting our street. The police have been called out twice but have not caught him yet. I pity the fool that tries to mess with my property. Aside from the two highly trained attack cats, we have a wide variety of weapons from the last five centuries and an unemployed man with anger management problems. Bring it on, pervert!

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Hyped up and blood thirsty.
2003-09-29 10:29 a.m.

I think I beat Tracy in the post kung fu camp bruise count, but she's right, Alisa beat us both. She looks like she was in a car accident, then when the abulance came it got in a wreck and after she finally made it to the emergency room the doctors took turns beating her up. I think she has more bruised skin than normal skin. And I thought I bruised easily. Here's another picture of me at camp. Isn't that scary? It looks like Eric's trying to kill me. Actually he's kneeing me in the face and then trying to punch me as I go down. This was a no contact drill so it looks more painful than it is. For more details of my kung fu camp experience click here or the previous button at the bottom of the page.

Last night I had tickets to my company's sky box at the Rose Garden for the Winterhawks (hockey) game. I had the time totally screwed up so we showed up late at the third period. Maybe it was being hyped up from camp, but I found myself getting very excited when a fight would break out on the ice. I'd be screaming "Why aren't you kneeing him!? Get him! Get him! You have blades on your feet, go for his instep!" That's what a week of street fighting will do to a nice demure girl.

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