Kungfukitten :: This Kitten Has Claws

I'm usually so RELAXED.

2005-11-06 5:53 p.m.

One of my shopping homies asked me to meet her for brunch at the Brasserie on Saturday. I love brunch at the Brasserie because of four little words: Unlimited Three Dollar Champagne. There's nothing like shopping when you're a little buzzed. I managed to find some brown high heel ankle boots, black loafers, a sweater, two shirts and get this - a pair of pants. You're probably thinking so what, people buy pants every day, but buying pants has always been a very traumatic event for me. Actually it's the trying on of pants that is traumatic - the buying is fine. While I was rifling through a huge rack of clothes, I saw a pair of brown Tommy cords that looked cute on the hanger. I didn't think they'd fit but I thought I'd give it a try. Not only did my legs slide in but so did my ass AND I could zip them up. I nearly peed myself when I saw the words SLIM LEG. Usually I need RELAXED or GENEROUS FIT or BIG ASS but SLIM LEG? I have not had slim legs since I was ten years old. I'm sure these pants are irregulars, or maybe have the wrong tag sewn on, but I'll be shaking my ass in my slim leg cords all this week. Being ill rocks. Hmm, an entire blog entry about new pants, who knew. Oh, almost forgot - best part designer pants for $24.99. I love Ross.

4 People have tried to sell me Viagra

I must be a true writer if I stink this bad.

2005-11-03 9:57 p.m.

NaNo goes slowly but well. I'm a little behind in my word cound but I know from experience that even a little bit of writing each day adds up. I'm also excited that I turned Glockgirl onto NaNo. Her word count and body count have surpassed mine but I'm plugging along. (She will be proud to know that my main character is carrying a glock.)

I fought off a two day migraine and am still feeling wiped out and for some reason my throat is tender and swollen. I don't know if it's just a common cold or something sarcoidosis related. Either way, all I know is that I've been sleeping many hours a day. I'm a professional snoozer. As usual, the cats are digging this whole afternoon nap thing. I woke up this evening with Loki under the covers next to me with his head on the pillow, snorning. Hilarious.

Want to hear something super gross? I hadn't washed my hair in four days. FOUR DAYS. I took an hour long lavender bubble bath this afternoon and scrubbed every inch of my skin, shaved everything that could be shaved, then shampooed and conditioned the hell out of my hair. I feel like a god damn super model. Being clean rocks.

1 People have tried to sell me Viagra

At least I was wearing clean underwear.

2005-11-01 11:31 p.m.

I woke up at the crack of dawn to make it to the hospital for my dermatology appointment. There was three feet of standing water on the Foster on ramp. I got half way through it when I felt my car slide sideways. I started panicking. I drive a miata so I knew the water was over the door line, I also knew there was a good chance my car would float downstream and I'd eventually end up in Johnson Creek. I down shifted to second gear and had barely enough traction (and momentum) to make it to pavement. I was so excited about not getting stuck that I forgot about pumping my breaks and blew through the revolving stop light while braking. Doh! Do you know hard it is to accelerate to the speed of traffic while pumping your breaks to dry them off and get them working again? Is not easy.

I got completely drenched running from the parking garage only to be told by the overly perky receptionist that my appointment is actually for tomorrow morning. I wanted to scream. Instead I looked at the lady and said. "Swear word! Swear word! Swear word!" So that counts as not cussing her out. I'm still not sure if I wrote the date down wrong or if the stupid dermatogloy receptionist told me the wrong date in her phone message.

So I came home, took some migraine medicine and took a long nap with the cats. Later I had to go all the way back to hospital for a cat scan of my lungs. "Put your arms over your head," said the technician guy. I do and my tiny cotton robe rides up to an obscene length. I quickly put my arms down and cover my shame. "OK, I'll hold the gown down and you put your arms up again." At this point we're both giggling like stoned junior high students. I'm high on migraine medication and so fucking sick of being poked, prodded, examed and scanned. I'm practically delerious. "Breath in! Hold! Exhale!" Yells the disembodied voice from the ceiling as I rotate back and forth through the huge metal donut.

NaNo started today but my word count remains at zero. Tomorrow I will get a proper start. I am excited to start playing with Bella Haven. Her bad boy interest is going to be an Elf named Malcolm. He needs a good last name. Any suggestions?

2 People have tried to sell me Viagra