Do I look psychotic?
2008-03-17 8:26 p.m.

You'd think being on disability, I'd be able to do the simple things I have do do while disabled, like show up to my doctor appointments on time. Well, my second appointment with Miss Josie could be called on time, if you meant I was five days early. For some reason I got 13th and the 18th mixed up in my iPhone iCal and I was iEarly. So like an iIdiot (I'm going to stop that running joke here) I decided to stop on my way home and pick up some pills at the pharmacy by house and get my standing blood orders done. Except my rheumatologist had forgotten to put them in the computer when he last saw me.

Basically, I have to get my bloodwork checked every eight weeks to make sure my liver and kidneys are happy and not getting blown up by the Methotrexate. They called the clinic and he was with a patient. They told me it shouldn't take too long. Finally, I just gave up and went home. Today I showed up for my doctors appointment with my primary care doctor an hour late. Luckily, she still saw me. Thank goodness. We spent some time listening to me cry, sniffle and then talk about my hair. Finally, we got down to business and she changed my medication for sleep. "This is also used for psychoses!" She said in passing. "Am I psychotic?" I asked giggling. She giggled back. Then in all seriousness she asked: "Are you worried about being psychotic?" I guess it would be a shame if I was really psychotic and not being treated for it. No, I'm not psychotic, I'm just suffering from anxiety, depression, insomnia, fatigue and sarcoidosis and all the things it's attacking like my eyesight, small joints, and low back pain and the other stuff I'm forgetting right now. I have an appointment tomorrow. I'll probably show up three hours early at the wrong clinic. 'Cause that's the way I roll. Yo.

I was driving home and feeling rather psychotic and asked the heavens above for a sign. I needed some sort of sign that I was going to be okay.

When I went around the corner there was a couple on a zippy vespa. I pulled over as far to the side as I could, so they had plenty 'o room. The girl on back gave me a thumbs up wave as they drove by and in my mind, these words popped into my head. "We've got your back covered." I smiled the rest of the way home. My little guardian angel fairy folk have my back covered and it feels okay. Even if I'm psychotic.

8 People have tried to sell me Viagra

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